episode 218: the 3 words that will change everything
Ever feel like you’re stuck in an endless loop of dieting rules, tracking, and feeling like you’re either winning or totally failing?
You’re not the only one. And the good news is there’s another way—and it starts with three simple words: Experimentation, Curiosity, and Practice.
In this episode, I break down why these words are the foundation of real, lasting change. You’ll learn:
🔥 Why strict rules and “on/off” thinking keep you stuck
🔥 How to shift from “I failed” to “What can I learn?”
🔥 The mindset that helps you actually figure out what works for YOU
Stop following rigid plans that don’t fit your life. Start creating your own way of eating on your own terms.
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218
[00:00:00] Welcome back to the Diet Diaries. This is now the third time I'm attempting to record this podcast after the first two times my microphone was on mute, and I look over at GarageBand and there's just a flat line. I'm like, oh shit, this isn't picking up any sound. Okay, here we go. I'm gonna keep this episode short and sweet.
The last couple of weeks have been more in depth, kind of deeper, a little bit more heady, kind of conceptual type stuff, and I want this to be Specific and to the point and kind of actionable and what I wanted to talk about today are what I believe are the three most important important words In coaching or versions of these words and they are experimentation, curiosity, and practice.
Because those, within those words, within the world of those words is where learning happens. Is where we have space, is where we have permission to try things, to make mistakes, to pay [00:01:00] attention, to notice, to be aware. It's not about following rules, it's not about rigidity, it's not about Um, compliance or obeying.
It's about noticing and it's about trying different things and figuring out what works for you. We're experimenting, coming up with an idea and saying, I wonder what would happen if I tried this and then trying it and then seeing what were the results of that. Were they helpful? Were they not helpful?
And then using that information to inform your next experiment, your next experiment. I'm being curious, right? I wonder what would happen. What would it feel like if I tried this? What would it feel like if I tried that? What feels different when I do this? What feels different when I do that? And by this and that, I mean, it's a huge range of things.
When I eat more protein, when I eat less protein, when I don't have fiber versus when I do have fiber, when I eat bigger meals, when I have more snacks, when I have dessert, when I don't have dessert. Right? Instead of just following a meal [00:02:00] plan, or following a rule that you've heard, or doing what you did 10 years ago to lose weight, getting curious.
about what happens, right? With experimentation, with curiosity, that's the space, that's how you create space to make mistakes, to, to have permission, to not feel trapped, to move out of that all or nothing space, right? This approach really helps you find more of that grey area, more of that in between, which is where you are going to find long term kind of ease, right?
Practicing. Practicing. It's like, it's not about, you know, it's not about practice makes perfect, it's about practice makes, practice makes practice. And practicing inherently leaves room for mistakes. It inherently leaves room for change. It inherently leaves room for improvement. It inherently leaves room that sometimes it's going to go better than other times.
Some days are going to be great and some days are going to be shitty. But it, again, it's about [00:03:00] creating that space for yourself and not locking yourself into something, not expecting yourself to be so perfect and so on track that if you make one mistake you go off track, right? This language, using this language, and not even just vocally, you know, externally, but internally, and the way that you talk to yourself about what you're doing, and this, these language is key.
I use these words very specifically. When we have our calls, when we talk about what you're working on, when we talk about how we're approaching something, I'm always using this language because this is how we start to move away from the all or nothing mindset, the I was good or I was bad, I blew it or I was awesome.
Right? This again is that messy in between space where you are learning. You have space to notice, to pay attention, to become aware. And that is what coaching is. At its core, it is about experimentation. It is about curiosity. Is it about, it is, it is about practicing. [00:04:00] It's about creating your own guidelines and your own structure.
But in order to create your own structure, You have to experiment and figure out what kind of structure works and what doesn't. And something not working is as valuable as something working. And again, right, it's, there's no such thing as the failure. It's just learning and seeing what didn't go well and how does that inform what's working.
What I want to try or experiment or be curious about next. And so I really encourage you to notice the language you use to talk to yourself and the the thought patterns you have around what you're following and what you're doing. Are you following a diet? Are you following a meal plan? How rigid are you being with yourself?
How do you talk to yourself when you make a mistake, when something doesn't go according to plan, when you start moving outside of your routine? Are you telling yourself you're off track? Are you telling yourself you've blown it, that you've fallen off the wagon? What would happen if, as a response to those thoughts, you said to yourself, Well, let me kind of get [00:05:00] curious about why do I think this happened?
What do I notice across the last couple of days or even within the course of this day that might have led me to this point, right? You're getting curious. Instead of just labeling the experience as bad, let's get curious about why we are where we are and what can I learn from it? And how does that inform what I can try next to maybe get a different outcome, right?
What am I going to experiment with? So this is how you take what I'm talking about and actually put it into action, right? And instead of saying to yourself, Oh, I was so good today. I was so on. I ate so clean. Maybe it's about, again, responding to that and saying like, I really worked hard at practicing my skills today.
And even on, and, and maybe today it felt really good and I made a lot of good choices and another day I practiced my skills and I made shitty choices or I didn't feel good or you know what? I didn't really practice much today. I'm going to practice tomorrow. You know, this is again how you start to put these words into practice.
And again, this is not a light bulb. That goes [00:06:00] off. It's not a switch that you flip. It is a slow progressive change that you make in terms of how you respond to your black and white thinking, your all or nothing thinking, with language like this. Um, to start to slowly re pattern that, to start to slowly experience other ways of moving through this.
Um, and I know in some ways I'm speaking in, in, in kind of vague language, but I'm hoping I'm giving you enough specificity around the specific words, experimentation, curiosity, practice, what to do with them and why they're important, that you can start to notice where Thinking and language like this currently shows up for you and where it doesn't.
And where there's opportunity to start to incorporate more of it. Not by shutting down or ignoring or trying to replace the old way of thinking or the, rather, I should say the current way of thinking, but how to respond to that. I've talked about that so much in many other episodes. We can't overtly and instantly change our [00:07:00] thoughts.
However, we can change how we respond to them, what we do. As a response to what we are thinking and starting to incorporate language like this and giving yourself the space to learn and pay attention to get curious to experiment is what is going to allow you to develop the skills and start to really make a shift from where you are, right?
This is what's going to let you move away from counting calories and counting macros and counting points. To figuring out what works for you, right? The only way that you move away from those things is if you start to pay attention to how food makes you feel. If you get curious about what happens when you have more protein, less protein, right?
I talked about this. If you experiment with, you know, different types of foods to see what you like, see what is more satisfying, less satisfying. Right? These words, experimentation, these practices, experimentation, curiosity, practice, are how you move away from a diet, right? There's no magic switch that flips where you're like, Oh, I'm just not going to diet anymore.
I'm not going to count calories. You have to have something else to do, right? You can't just like shut that [00:08:00] off. You're like, then what do I do? How do I eat? This is how you learn how to eat. This is how you learn how to trust yourself. This is how you learn how to feel at ease. is by experimenting, is with curiosity so that you can notice and create your own way of eating.
That's really at its core what this is about. Experimentation, curiosity, practicing allows you, again, I said this before, I'm repeating myself, allows you to create your own structure, allows you to create your own way of eating so that you know what works for you. You are the only person who is like you.
What works for you is not going to work exactly for someone else and vice versa. Might be some similarities, right? We can use some guidelines as a starting point to experiment with. But those guidelines of eat X grams of protein a day, eat X grams of fiber, we can use those again. It can experiment with that.
How do you feel when you do eat that? Not do this and that's it, the be all end all. It's very different to say what happens when I try this versus I must do this and this is the only way, right? That is how these things play out separately [00:09:00] and how they lead you, how these ways of thinking leads you down very, very different paths over time.
I think I'm good. Anything else I think, I say I think is going to be repetitive. I promised I would keep it short. We're at like 10, 11 minutes right on the nose. Thanks for being here. I appreciate you for listening and I'll be back next week.