episode 221: the fine line between influence and inspiration
You know that feeling when your feed is flooded with must-have trends, game-changing routines, or life-changing products? Whether it’s the latest fashion sale or the "perfect" meal plan, it’s so easy to get swept up in the idea that we need something to look good, feel good, or be good enough.
But here’s the thing—do you even like it? Does it actually work for you?
In this episode, I’m peeling back the layers of influence—how it sneaks into what we wear, what we eat, and even how we see ourselves.
Here’s what I’m talking about today:
The sneaky ways consumer culture convinces us we’re missing something
How to pause and check in before hitting "add to cart" (or overhauling your breakfast)
The difference between inspiration and influeence—and how to spot the increasingly fine line
Practical ways to stay connected to what truly fits your life, body, and goals
This isn’t about never shopping or ignoring advice—it’s about owning your choices so they actually work for you.
-
221
[00:00:00] Hey friends, welcome back to the diet diaries. Uh, this episode is coming out on Monday, March 24th. We say this all the time, but time just time is weird. Time is crazy. I can't believe it's already Monday, March 24th. Um, Right? It just feels like, I don't know, New Year's was five minutes ago. Um, I'm happy. I love spring.
Spring is my favorite season and we've had some really nice kind of warm days in New Jersey after what's been like a really, really cold winter. So I'm excited. I know a lot of you out there who suffer from allergies don't love spring. I'm sorry that you have to go through that. Uh, I love spring. So let's dive in today.
This is going to be a pretty short episode. I always say that, right? And sometimes I end up talking for longer than I plan to. And I was looking at my notes. I had made notes a couple of weeks ago about an idea for a podcast. And then I made Separate set of notes just a few days ago, and I was looking back at them I'm like these are [00:01:00] kind of the same idea, but I'm actually feeling I'm gonna keep them separate They're they're similar but different and I think I'm gonna do one this week and one next week So kind of like a little like part one part two one to keep it short and two because the ideas again They're related, but I think there's enough nuance that it's helpful to talk about them separately so what I'm gonna talk about today is that Last week, there was a big sale on a retailer called Shopbop.
Now, you may or may not be familiar with this retailer. Um, I have shopped there for a very long time. It's an online retailer. They're actually quite huge. They were acquired by Amazon many years ago, um, and just weirdly enough, when I was in college, they were starting out in like 1999, they started out in Madison, Wisconsin, and they were looking for college students to kind of like rep them on campus.
Basically, like, influencers before influencing was a thing, right, this is like the late 90s. Um, and I, I, I somehow was, [00:02:00] like, heard from them, they reached out to me, I don't know how or why, but I said no. And I'm like, oh my god, that would have been so cool, like, this company became like this huge clothing retailer.
Anyway, I buy, I've talked about them before. I think they are a really great retailer to buy from. You may have feelings about Amazon. I'm not going to get into that. Um, their shipping is really fast. Their returns are really easy. When you send something back, you often get returned as soon as they scan it in at UPS.
They show models in multiple sizes, usually in, um, kind of like a 12, 14 size body. And then, um, kind of in a smaller size body. And they usually have a really good range of sizes and brands and it's just, I really enjoy shopping there. Anyway, they had a sale last week, 20 percent off, like a lot of items.
And I follow a good number of stylists slash creators slash influencers and the amount of links that were being posted by all of these people was overwhelming. In stories, in their ShopMys and their ShopLTKs, all the different platforms where [00:03:00] like, Creators basically make money off of what they post, and I mean, so much.
Like, a couple of people that I follow posted it within, like, the ShopMy app. That's another, like, one of these shopping apps that creators use, if you're not familiar. It's like an LTK. It's like the cool new LTK, kind of. And if you don't know what LTK is, it doesn't even matter. Um, and like 30, 40, 50 items, right?
And they're not suggesting that you buy all these. I know that. But when you're following all these different people and all of them are posting different stuff. You're basically getting fed links to hundreds of items of clothing in one day with a lot of messaging around like, you need this, this is must have, this is the look of the season.
Like a very kind of like, you must buy this with the result being if you don't, you will not look cute, you will not feel good, you will not be stylish, you will look frumpy and gross and dated, [00:04:00] right? That's kind of like what they're inferring. And I know that nobody actually um, does any of this maliciously?
But the reality is, right, intent versus impact, right? The intent is not to do that, but the impact is like, this is the reality of living in consumer culture, which is crazy and overwhelming. And I'm like scrolling through these things and I'm, I'm clicking on things and I'm looking at things and I ended up buying a t shirt that I had wanted, a fitted white t shirt that is the only, and I bought a gift for someone.
Those are the only things I bought. I did not buy anything that I had not already been looking for. That's something I'm really working on that just because something is on sale, don't buy it. Only buy things that are on sale. If it's something that you've wanted for a long time, that's a super helpful shopping tip that I really has helped me a lot.
So I'm looking at all these links, and it's so overwhelming. And this idea of like, you need this, you need this, you need this, but it's like, do I really need this? What exactly does that mean? [00:05:00] And I'm starting to ask myself, like, will these things make me happy? Why, why am I even looking at this? Why am I spending time, energy, and attention clicking on these links and scrolling through?
And I probably spent like a lot of time over the course of, I don't know how many days of sales live. It was a, it was a while. It was like five or six days. And content being posted multiple days by multiple people that I follow. Yes, I choose to follow them. Yes, I'm exposing myself to this. Totally. I take responsibility for that.
And this really comes back to this idea of we so easily lose sight. Of what works for us and we let someone else tell us what to like. And I think this is such, so, so important because it, it's very insidious and it kind of creeps and expands its little tentacles into other areas where not only are we told what to, like, we're told.
Like, what looks good, how we should look, what looks acceptable, right? If, if let's say Western is cool and trendy this year, well does that mean that if I don't have a [00:06:00] fringe suede jacket and a big buckle belt and like a Western style boot that I don't look good or that I'm out of style? Like what is, what does that mean?
Does that mean that I am not, like I can't dress stylishly or I can't feel good about how I look? And the answer to that is no, like a resounding no, but it's very, very easy to get sucked in and think that these things, these pieces of clothing, jewelry, whatever it is, will make us feel a certain way. And sometimes they do, right?
But not all of it. And it's far less than we think, right? Like constantly buying new things because there's a sale or because an influencer tells us or because it's on trend or it's the cool new thing this year or it's a new season and inexplicably you need to get your spring wardrobe. What happened to your The clothes that are already in your closet.
I don't understand that like these people who like buy new all new clothes every spring Like what where is the stuff that you had? Um[00:07:00]
It's, it's very easy to think that you need all these things to feel good about yourself, and that is not true. So the idea here is not to say don't buy anything. Don't follow these people. No, I follow them, I learn a lot, and of course I do buy things. But it's to start to pay very close attention to why you are buying that thing.
Is it because, is it out of fear? Is it out of trying to like keep up? Is it out of like, well I don't know what I like, or I don't know what looks good, so I'm gonna let them tell me? Because that's where it starts to get problematic. You have to figure out what works for you. And I am going to connect this back to food.
I actually talked about this in this week's email, which I did not even plan that these were going to kind of link up. But I post my breakfast very often, right? And I, for a long time, I have been eating a version of a Greek yogurt bowl or cottage cheese bowl. Smoothies, I've kind of phased out of smoothies for a while.
I'm sure I will come back to them. I actually had one over the weekend and talked about it. Whatever. I post those not to say you should eat this. [00:08:00] I post it to share what I'm doing, to help give you ideas, to get you thinking about what will work for you, to show the amount of food that I eat. There's a lot of reasons why.
It is not to say do this. It is not to say this is how you have to eat or this is what you should like or this is the only way to get protein. It's to give you inspiration and get you thinking about what works for you. And so looking at all these links to all these clothes just really got me thinking about this and how easy it is to think that because someone else tells me that I should buy this thing or wear this thing that I should do that it will make me feel good and that is just not true.
We, in the culture that we live in, in the amount of, um, content that we consume, which we don't even realize how much it is, via social media, the rate at which it's coming at us, the volume, the, the frequency, the intensity, the language that comes along with it. It is [00:09:00] essential, crucial, mandatory to really pay attention to why you are doing things.
Why am I buying the thing this influencer is telling me to buy. Why am I following this meal plan that this coach is telling me to do? Why am I copying Jordana's breakfast? Why am I doing this 30 day challenge that this trainer is telling me to do? Is it because that they said it worked for them or they said it worked for their clients or that you have to have it, or this is the only way, or this is the best way, or if you don't do this, you're not going to feel this way, you're not going to get these results.
Those are the things that you really have to question. And when you do that, you will start to be able to take action much more in alignment with your values and much more in connection with what feels good for you with who you are and less being pressured from the outside. This is work. It's not easy.
But what I'm, the reason I wanted to talk about [00:10:00] this is because I want, this is about paying attention and noticing, right? And I think online shopping is a really great place to start when you see a link to something. And you want to buy it, or you put it in your shopping cart, or you're watching what someone is wearing, or what they're doing, and you're thinking, Oh, I need that, or I want that, or if I had that I would feel good, because they're telling me I need it.
Notice the thoughts. Notice what's happening. What's the story that you're telling yourself? And go ahead, put that thing in your cart, but pause, hang on a second, wait, don't buy it immediately. Think about, I shared this the other day, um, and I'm going to share it here because I think it's super helpful.
When there's something that you want to buy, because someone's telling you that you need to have it, or you like it, or it's a must have, it's trendy, whatever, you want to think in your head of at least, at a minimum, three outfits that you can make with that thing. And if you can't think of three outfits, my recommendation is do not buy that thing, right?
Okay. When you. look and see a meal that someone [00:11:00] is prepping or that they're eating on repeat or that they're saying is really good, right? Ask yourself, do I like that thing? Does it fit my lifestyle to prep that thing? And maybe there's a third question, like, am I going to get leftovers from it, right?
What is it, how is it relevant to you? Just because it works for them or just because someone is saying like, this is the thing, doesn't mean that that's true for you or will work for you. Maybe there's a version of that that will work for you. Um, So, this is really about noticing when we get sucked in to reacting to doing things based on what someone else is telling us to do point blank because it's what's cool, it's what gets results, it's what you have to do without thinking about, well, what do I actually like?
What's my lifestyle? What are my goals? What are my preferences? What's my budget when it comes to shopping? How am I going to wear this thing? I know I'm kind of mixing food and clothes. It's okay. There's a lot of overlap here just in kind of the concept. [00:12:00] Um, and yeah, I think that's really what I wanted to just kind of talk about today.
Um, just paying attention to when you are being influenced and how you are being influenced and is it working for you? Is it helping you? Um, how much are you being influenced versus how much are you staying connected to you? And remembering, what do you like? Do you know what you like? Do you know what works for you?
Right? When you eat something for breakfast, you know how it makes you feel, or are you just eating because someone told you to eat it? And you don't even know, or you're starving two hours later, but you're like, Well, this is what this person told me to eat, so it must be good. It doesn't matter that I'm hungry two hours later.
Like, no. No, that's not working. Right? Don't buy those jeans just because they, that girl liked them. Do you like them? Do they fit? Are they comfortable for you? Or are you just buying them because they're like the cool, trendy jean? Right? This is really what it's about. I feel like I kind of just got to it in the last two minutes, so hopefully you hung in with me.
Um, that's really what it's about [00:13:00] is really paying attention. Does this working for me or am I doing this for some external reason that I think is going to make me feel a certain way? All right. That's all I got for you today. Thanks for being here. I'll see you next week.