Most of us learn, from a super early age, that some foods are good and some foods are bad.

Good foods are “healthy” foods. Vegetables, fruits, low fait dairy, lean meats, whole grain bread.

Bad foods are “unhealthy” or “junk” food. Candy, cake, cookies, ice cream, chips, donuts, pastries, hot dogs. This type of thinking can be a huge block for binge eating recovery and can often have you wondering “am I addicted to sugar?”

But it goes even deeper than that:

• Veggies are good (but not carrots, those are too high in sugar).

• Bread is bad. But whole grain or sprouted bread is less bad.

• Some fruit is good (but not bananas and not high glycemic fruit).

• Candy is bad.

• Potatoes are good, but only sweet potatoes.

• Low fat is better than full fat.

(You get my sarcasm above, right? 😉)

And when you eat good foods you should feel good and when you eat bad foods you should feel bad.

But even beyond that we learned very quickly to equate the “goodness or badness” of our food with our own worthiness and morality.

If I eat good food, I am a good person. If I eat bad food, I am a bad person.

Food became part of our identity. It decided what kind of person we were, what we were worthy of and what we’re allowed to do. That is why reframing these foods is such a huge part of binge eating recovery. Listen to episode 106 of The Diet Diaries for more binge eating support.

But here’s the thing friends. Food is an inanimate object. It has no moral value. It has nutritional value, caloric value, taste value, pleasure value. But thats it.

Something can taste good or taste bad. Something can be more nutritious or less nutritious. Food can make you have more energy or less energy. Food can provide you more or less energy based on the calories.

But it can’t make you, as a person, good or bad.

So how do we start to unlearn this black and white thinking so we can stop letting food dictate our mood and our self esteem?

Well, we need to understand that different foods have different roles. Some foods are eaten for nutrition and fullness. Some foods are eaten for joy and pleasure. Some foods are eaten for both.

This is why shifting the framework that you use to think about food is so important.

Away from good vs. bad to nutrient dense vs. calorie dense. This takes away all the emotion and the judgment and creates an objective, neutral way to think about food.

Nutrient dense means a food is packed with nutrition and usually less processed—some mix of proteins, carbs, fats and lots of micronutrients like vitamins and minerals.

Calorie dense means a food is packed with calories and often more processed (but not always). Calories are a unit of energy.

And here’s another important thing: nutrient dense and calorie dense are not opposites. They coexist. That’s why this framework is a grid and not a spectrum. And that’s why the good/bad dichotomy doesn’t even logically make sense.

With this new framework, you can begin to ask questions like:

• How am I using this food?

• How is it aligning with my goals?

• How does it fit with how I want to feel?

The answers to those questions will give you everything you need to know about whether a food is a wise choice for you in any given situation.

Because health is not just about the nutritional value of your food….health is about making choices around food that connect to your values as a human. That connect to your why. That help make you feel more like yourself, not less like yourself.

And that’s going to include the less nutritious foods too. Less nutritious does not mean unhealthy. It just means it has less nutrients. That’s it.

Just like more nutritious foods aren’t automatically healthy. If you’re only eating those foods because you’re terrified of anything else, your mental health is probably not in a great place. And that matters. A lot.

Every single food on this grid is part of a nutritious, satisfying, satiating way of eating (as long as you like it). Do we need to be more aware of portions of some of the more calorie dense foods? Yes, of course. But that doesn’t make those foods bad. It just means we need to put in the effort to practice our skills so that we can use those foods in a way that line up with what our body AND brain need.

Here’s a link to a blog post I wrote all about a skill that can be a game changer for incorporating the more calorie dense/less nutrient dense foods.

You can use the quadrants of this grid as a tool based on your goals:

1. The upper right and left quadrants are where you want to get 80% of your food from because nutrient dense food is important for all aspects of your health and well being.

2. If you are focusing on fat loss you want to get a bigger portion of that 80% from the upper left quadrant which will help you more easily regulate calorie intake without restricting or having any rules around food.

3. Add in your favorite foods from the bottom right quadrant AFTER you’ve made your choices from the top of the grid. This helps ensure that you’re using those less nutrient dense/more calorie dense foods for the right job which is pure pleasure and enjoyment—not nutrition or satiety.

4. And the bottom left quadrant you can add in when you need or want to….just be aware of trying to “healthify” more calorie dense foods.

If you like the more nutrient dense or less calorie dense version of a brownie or candy just as much, then great. But if you’re choosing those ONLY because you think they are a “less bad” option….then you’re still walking around with those good/bad guidelines and it’s time to pause and reconnect to your values which will play a huge role in binge eating recovery.

If you’re looking for more resources to feel at ease around food and lose weight without dieting, this blog post will be super helpful for you. You can also take a listen to episode 132 of The Diet Diaries which talks all about how to avoid the instant gratification trap that is a huge barrier to binge eating recovery.